In FRISKY FRIDAY by The Ajland

Confidence is the key to many things in life… relationships, business, school, and success – but how does one acquire it? With International Women’s Day being today, it made me realize how often I see references where women feel like they’re lacking. While it’s natural for us to have insecurities in various aspects of our lives, I think your own sexuality shouldn’t be one of them. Well, clearly. In any event, confidence is one thing but I’m more focused on how we feel sexy. There is something so damn hot about a sensual woman. Not in the arrogant way but in the ‘I fuck with myself’ way. This confidence is irrelevant of a partner being with you; it comes from within. You know that feeling when a man rolls up his shirt sleeves and his forearms show and you get that, “I wanna ride your face for the next twenty minutes” feeling – YES, I want you to feel that but about yourself. Now, ladies… let’s chat.

Without further ado…

Side Note: Today’s post was originally going to be regarding the upcoming Steak and Blowjob day, but that wasn’t very IWD friendly, so you get what you get.

Side side note: I know it’s been a hot minute since I’ve posted and I’d be lying if I said this won’t be the norm. I’ve submitted my scripts and the words for those have been flowing out of me, so I have to put that first. I promise to hop on here again before I head to Long Beach tho! xo


An expensive habit but my favourite one. Ladies, if you haven’t incorporated wearing lingerie on a daily basis, I beg you to try it for a week. Wearing pretty things in a soft fabric can be fun and a boost on your day since it’s like your own little dirty secret. I mentioned a couple of my fave companies to buy from on my 2018 Valentines post since a woman can never have enough – I’m not kidding, corsets can double as tops on nights out. If you really need a pep in your step, jump on the daily lingerie train. All aboard.

Bae Tip: If you’re on a day date with your man, put on some pretty panties and thigh highs that are capable of being concealed by your clothing. Put his hand on your leg and let him spot the garter. Ayeeee, have fun!


Disclaimer: Prepare for bruises and sore muscles. Pole dancing gets ALL the points. It’s probably one of the hardest workouts I’ve tried and that’s just one of the benefits. In addition to being an amazing physical push, it completely brings out your sensuality. Bust out your inner stripper, giiirl, I know she’s in there. If you’re in Vancouver, I can’t recommend Tantra Fitness enough but I’m sure most metropolitan cities have their own – they offer everything from Erotic Dance to Aerial Hoops to classes for learning the splits.

Bae Tip: Take the Lapdance class and surprise your king with what you learned.


“A year or so ago I met this girl off Tinder and we hit it off straight away. Like, went from exchanging pleasantries to smut chat in less than 5 minutes. She lived nearby and wanted a FWB so I obliged. I drove over to her house and she was…a little bigger than her photos indicated but I didn’t mind. She was cute and horny. Anyway, we get down to business and I started fingering her. She was super aroused. I inserted one finger, then two, then three and she was happy. Then she grabbed the back of my neck and stared me in the eye and said, in an aggressive tone, “I WANT YOUR WHOLE HAND IN ME…”

Uh. Okay. Four fingers. Then the thumb and suddenly it just gobbled my hand up like I was feeding a horse an apple. I’ve never fisted anyone before so I thought it was pretty neat, punching her cervix like that. So did she. We saw each other a couple of times and shit always got weird.”



After incorporating meditation into my nightly routine, my sleep schedule is the best it’s ever been. I wake up feeling refreshed and ready to kick-start my day at 5 AM, no lie. Things like sleeping well and a proper diet can make a drastic effect in how we feel day-to-day. I know how much I love Churches Chicken but I really do have to spend days of eating properly in order to balance that out. If you’re feeling groggy and bloated, you aren’t gonna feel like your best self, nonetheless sexy. Girl, put yourself on! Oh, and drink water. Someone once told me that if you even start to feel thirsty, that means you aren’t drinking enough.

Bae Tip: Have sex every night before bed at an early hour so you’re both knocked the fuck out by bedtime.


As I said, confidence comes from within, and improving yourself mentally is a necessary boost. I always have my nose in a book or on Reddit and I genuinely enjoy learning new things. I’m sure my friends would rather I text them less random facts every day but hey, someones gotta take an L somewhere. In any event, the more knowledge you collect, the more confident you feel as your brain isn’t idle. If you aren’t absorbing new information, this leads to boredom, and eventually leads to you feeling… blah, for the lack of better words. If you only take one thing from this entire post, take the mantra “always be learning”. Don’t go to bed without one single thing that made you wiser than the day before. A smart bitch is my kinda bitch.

Bae Tip: Have you and your man text each other a random fact each day. Make it a competition and whoever has the better one wins something sexual. (Do not cheat and text me asking for a good fact to send your boo!)


“I lost my virginity to my first girlfriend in the cringiest way possible. We were in missionary position and the moment I penetrated her, I kind of fell on top of her softly and cried out, “There, I gave it to you.” It, being my virginity. I don’t know why but I was emotional about it…yeah. I cringe extremely hard whenever I think about that moment.”

– Reddit


I don’t know where the winter hairy leg memes were born but if it applies to you, Houston, we have a problem. Whether you shave or wax – get rid of it, always. Even if no ones seeing it, feeling your own smooth body can be a huge turn on. Still not convinced? Imagine you run into the crush of your lifetime and you can’t have unexpected sex because you decided to let your legs resemble a Labradors.

Solo Tip:
Mix olive oil + brown sugar + and lemon juice, scrub your legs then shave. Rub your legs together afterwards. You’re welcome.


Have you ever found yourself naturally drawn to people even without speaking to them, as if there’s just something about them that pulls you in? I find I’m easily attracted to friendships and such with people that radiate a certain energy. In fact, I’ve raised my vibrations so high that I am almost instantly turned off by those that carry negative thoughts with them. Vibes don’t lie and you truly can feel another’s energy. You can ask anyone who practices the laws of attraction and they’ll tell you the same. Start your day with telling yourself 3 things your grateful for and then go to the mirror and tell yourself 3 things you love about your body. Trust me.


Hey, you, you can feel sexy at home by your damn self. Even the simple things like rubbing lotion. Do it in front of a mirror to some Pretty Ricky, light some candles, dance to it, hump your mirro- wait, maybe not that last one. Cook in knee high socks and a t-shirt, take some sexy pictures, sleep naked, use a vibrator – whatever it is, find your own comfort zone and step out of it. The more you get used to your sensual side, the more confidence in yourself you will find, I promise.

Bae Tip: Let your boo watch you do all of the above.

That’s it, that’s all, folks. Happy International Womens Day, ladies. If no one told you today, you fine as hell. If you’re looking for some more Frisky Friday, with an emphasis on the ‘Frisky’:

What it’s like dating in the Millennial era
Tips for not putting your dick in crazy
Some lessons on picking up the ladies

Hope you all have a good weekend, and as always, thanks for reading. xoxo